No Knead Dutch Oven Bread - Plain White Loaf

3 cups of all purpose flour

2 or 3 teaspoons of kosher salt

Half a teaspoon of dry active yeast

One and a half cups of lukewarm water

Throw the flour into a bowl, add yeast and salt - lightly stir around with whatever gadget you have on standby. Add water, stir with wooden spoon or danish whisk until it's all incorporated and kinda shaggy looking. Cover with something and set aside in a warm place in your kitchen for 8 to 24 hours.

When you uncover it, it should be kinda foamy, kinda bubbly and gooey.

About an hour and a half before you want to bake this bad boy, place the sloppy goo onto a well floured surface (cover your hands with flour too and try to not cringe), form it into a ball shape making sure the top is nice and pretty and well floured. I actually find this easiest to do on a piece of parchment paper set on top of a wooden board which makes transferring a hell of a lot easier. Cover your pretty plump ball with a cloth and set back in that warm, snug spot for about an hour.

About 30 minutes before bake time, pre heat your oven to 450 degrees and put the dutch oven (with lid on) into the oven at the beginning of pre heat. You want that dutch oven and lid to get good and hot. When that 30 minutes is up, carefully set dutch oven onto your counter (use something to protect counter surface, use gloves for crying out loud) and gently move your pretty plump ball of unbaked bread into the dutch oven - placing it in there with the parchment paper underneath is perfectly fine and makes it easier to get it in....and out. If you are feeling fancy, slash (well, technically the term is "score") the top of your bread before placing into oven. Just get a sharp knife and slice a shallow slash or three into the top. Some people use fancy scoring tools and create all sorts of pretty patterns. I have not. I want to someday but for now, I just slash and dash.

Bake covered for 30 minutes, remove lid after 30 and bake for a further 12 to 15 minutes. Then remove dutch oven from the actual oven (so much oven), set on a trivet and remove pretty plump ball and parchment paper and set onto another trivet....or board....or whatever. Let it COOL before cutting because if you hack into it too soon, it will suck and be all gummy.

Trouble Shooting Tips

 - SPOON the flour into your measuring cup. Don't just shove the cup into the flour container and scoop the flour out. Because then your bread will be really heavy and dense. Take the minute to spooooooon it into cup before putting it into a bowl. Trust me.

- I could explain what the temp of lukewarm water means because I was oddly curious about the origins of this "temperature". I even wondered who Luke was. So I googled it. And encourage you to do the same. Rather interesting actually. But you'll find that packets of dry active yeast will tell you what a good temperature water is - I find about 100 - 110 is pretty on the mark and have a kitchen thermometer to check. Finally that thermometer is getting used for more than poking holes in the top of tin foil. Yay!

- Parchment paper is awesome. Make sure you buy the stuff that is able to take on temps up to 500 degrees. Not all ovens are created equal so be sure to check your bread after that first 30 minutes. Our old workhorse of an oven is a little fussy at times so I do the uncovered bake part for 12 minutes instead of 15 because I like to have my crust more of a golden color instead of too dark.

Anyway, there you have it my friends. Bread. Sounds complex but trust me, it's not. It's bloody easy and a simple recipe that anyone can do if they have a dutch oven. I opted to put the recipe up first because my personal loathing is to look up recipes online....especially on blogs, and you have to read and scroll past a load of bollocks by someone who have a yuppy name ending in "ley/lee" just to get to the good stuff. I'm very anti that. Can you tell? I solemnly promise that when I share a recipe, I'll always put it up first....and then I'll yap on about anything else. And if you choose to read on after the recipe, then cheers and thanks. If not, no worries.

Now I'd like to publicly state here and have it noted for the record, that I am NOT a baker or chef by trade. And nor will I ever become so. I'm not opening a bakery, I'm not suddenly going to pounce onto the scene like some apron clad, knife wielding ninja. I'm just like so many others who found themselves wanting to pass some time during this pandemic and learn new things. I'd no sooner call myself a baker than I'd fly to the moon. Nothing peeves me more than someone who figures out how to do shit and then suddenly bestows the title of that thing onto themselves (yeah that's a direct stab at anyone who picks up a camera, takes a few photos on automatic and suddenly tells everyone they are a photographer) - nope nope my friends. Not cool. You put in the years, you take professional instruction, you do the hard yakka - THEN you get the right to use that title. And I have no intent of heading off to culinary school or baking school or anything like that. I'm just a mad bitch in the kitchen, that is all. And I'm happy to share what I can do with friends or anyone who wants a feed.

There are some outstanding professional bakers in Dayton and in Ohio in general. As much as I enjoy baking, I also strongly support the local and small business scene - now more than ever, these small businesses need our support! So while I'll cheerfully fluff around in my home kitchen and make a mess and keep playing with food - I will also be a huge supporter and advocate for these local folk so if you want some solid recommendations, just shoot me a message and I'll tell you all about who has amazing baked goodness in the area. They are the true bakers here. Not me.

So there you have it. My first blog post for this year.....considering how bad I've been in the past two years about blogging, I'm hopefully going to keep the momentum and chat about whatever strikes my fancy. Music, fashion, food, local businesses, things and thoughts for whomever might care to read. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm outta here to play with fabric and bide my time until dinner. Because guess what I'll be eating? You GUESSED IT! BREAD!

Stay Toasty (pun intended as always)

Sam xx